Expressions and Opinions

Impressions vs. reality - The Darden experience

2010-09-14T04:58:00.009+05:30

As I enter into the fourth week of the MBA program at Darden, I wonder how has the experience has been so far. Before coming to Darden, I had talked to a number of current/ex. students about their experiences... how things work at Darden etc. Therefore, I came to Darden with a fair amount of preconceived ideas/expectations.

While it is good to find what you expected, it is actually very interesting to find things that you didn't think of or you thought will be different. No matter how much you pre-think about what all challenges you might face in a new place, especially an MBA school, you'll always miss out on the granularity of how things might turn out. This goes back to an interesting story that one of my classmates told us about the time he went for scubadiving for the first time. Before taking the plunge in the water, he used to think that scubadiving should not be that big a challenge. But when he got to know on the spot that he had to breathe the air out of his lungs to go down into water, it presented several complicated challenges to him. Moral of the story - In life, one always comes across challenges when doing something new but you got to breathe the air out of your lungs and take the plunge. What a strong message!! I have been blown away by this.

Anyways, for me there have been several good and not so good surprises. Personally, I didn't realize what kind of challenges the case study method would exactly present. There are two aspects to it that I didn't think a lot about before coming to Darden. First, being an international student, it gets really hard to contribute to some of the subjective/nebulous discussions in the class. Second, having no background in a subject (e.g. Accounting) doesn't help you a lot in getting those brownie points in class participation.

So, I'm hanging in there. Trying my best. Need to learn so much. In the first few days, it was disheartening if a class passed when I couldn't contribute something. On such days while on my way back home, I would curse myself for not thinking fast enough or not raising my hand or not being confident enough. But eventually I realized that I need to look at the positive aspect of it. The days when I cant contribute are obviously the days that I learn the most. I know it doesn't help my Class Participation points but seriously, I mean seriously - is life only about it? I think learning is much more important to me right now than proving that I know stuff. Atleast thats one of the objective I set for myself before coming to Darden.

All other things are just rolling fine. It just takes someone coming from India to get accustomed to Baseball, Foodtball, Softball and the endless list of games and their metaphors being used all the time. Some Darden specific terms - "in the box" and "networking" make to your ears a gazillion times during the first few weeks. I am surprised to see how much support Darden provides to International students. There are just tonnes of resources to help International students. Its amazing.

Well, the exams are around the corner. Maybe I wont get a homerun on that but I am just ready to punt it in the fourth down. I guess that will make sense to y'all. :)

Across the border

2009-10-16T17:19:00.001+05:30

This was definitely a prolonged hiatus in the gunfire from across the border. I raised my head and saw a buzzard taking a solitary flight. I tried to run but could barely totter. The precarious conditions which I had previously undermined had enlivened my macabre fears. I scratched my stubble and hollered at the top of my voice out of frustration. There was not a soul.

I had never believed colonel’s stories, always considered them to be his attempts at praising defence life by jacking them up a bit. It was his stab at breaking the drudgery of his lame job, which he claimed he carried out pretty doggedly all year long. The visitors’ diffident manner was always turned outwards by his enthralling, fervent anecdotes of his apparent heyday. He would slide down comfortably in his chair and cast a spell on the listener with stories of his marksman capabilities. He was a sniper of some order. But, I never wanted to sassy and tell him exactly what I thought about his trash stories. His face would have gone livid and he would have become furious. I always kept listening, which made me feel feeble sometimes. I was not the kinds who would sass him but listen patiently, smile appropriately and show my fake interest whenever he was so forthcoming. I used to think to myself, correcting his ways is like squaring the circle – a hopeless, meaningless, vain undertaking.

Once, colonel was cracking jokes about how he had fooled Xobile's brother once. This set Xobile’s teeth on the edge. But the colonel would not stop; nothing could make him realize that Xobile might take umbrage at his rudeness. I knew Xobile would soon go stark raving mad and strangle the colonel. I ordered him to retire to the barracks knowing his ephemeral bad temper. I knew he would forget this by the morning....

Mixed feelings

2008-11-22T16:45:00.000+05:30

During this Diwali vacation, I realized that I am just waiting for a chance to devote all my energy to. Something larger than life to stand up for. And I have been waiting for this desperately. I still dont know whats my calling in life.. what is it that deeply moves me... I only have a faint idea of it. But I am not sure.

Happiness comes from efforts you put in towards an achievement and not the achievement itself. Otherwise, everyone would have been sitting in casinos, making easy money. We work, human beings work and learn from it, develop ourselves, make the society a better place.. and that makes them happy.

My mind is endlessly battling with thoughts, actions about what is right and what is wrong. I want to change myself.. the way things are.. change is good and I have always found change good.

The problem with normal human beings is that we can focus on only one thing and then work towards it. I cant conquer a mountain daily. Perhaps, the time would come when I would be ready for that. But who knows? Another thing about fighting it out is sometimes I think I would give my best shot when the chance is just right.. wait for the opportunity.. the dream opportunity.. which never comes.

Should I wait for opportunity or create opportunity?

Indira (Katherine Frank)

2008-09-04T10:16:00.001+05:30

Katherine Frank took six years to write this meticulously detailed account of Indira which invited a lot of flak (more) due to her brief focus on the intimate vista of Indira’s life. Though I am not trying to pull chestnut out of fire here but I would like to opine that there is hardly any conclusion that Frank has drawn in her book about the rumours of Indira’s possible involvement with her German teacher at Shantiniketan, or then M. O. Mathai or Dinesh Singh or Dhirendra Brahmachari, not to mention P. K. Haksar or the entire male population of India. The misapprehension in the Congress camp is an old age thin-skinned habit of trying to see demons where they are not. If anything, this is not an attempt by Frank to show Indira’s feet of clay.

The book is written with the precision and exhaustiveness of a scholar, footnoting sources ubiquitously. However, there is little, if any analysis of these facts, possibly due to the reason that as a foreign biographer, Katherine does not come close enough to have the sensitivity to analyse the life of Indira.

“Indu boy” was born in the same month as the Russian Revolution and she always felt that her life was linked to the trajectory of history. She had a tough childhood due to her mother’s illness and finally sad demise; and even more challenging married life with Feroze. Indira grew upto become a gutsy politician who took draconian measures to suit her political motives. Charged guilty of illegal practices in election campaigns, she refused to resign and declared a state of emergency. However, Frank supports her authoritarianism by saying that she “was guilty of hubris but not megalomania.”

Further reads: Pupul Jayakar’s Indira Gandhi: An Intimate Biography (1993) and Inder Malhotra’s Indira Gandhi: A Personal and Political Biography (1991).

The Grapes Of Wrath (John Steinbeck)

2007-03-11T10:21:00.000+05:30

Grapes of Wrath is perhaps the most noteworthy and famous novel based on the economic downturn termed as “Great Depression” in the US in early 30′s. The story revolves around an Oklahoma family amongst hundreds of thousands of poor people migrating to California in search of living. The state of Oklahoma was particularly hit during those times by mechanization of agriculture and Dust Bowl drought.In the story, the Joads sell off their house and land to move from their hometown to (deceptively) promising land of California in vain hope of finding a living. Living frugal, almost miserable lifestyle the Joads foraged fruit picking farms to earn as little as 2.5 cents per hour. All kind of mishaps occur during the course of the journey and afterwards; both grandma and granddad pass away on the way, Rose of Sharon (the daughter of the family) gives birth to a stillborn child, Casy – a preacher who had accompanied the family on this errand is killed for leading a strike against low labor costs. Tom Joad, the lead protagonist, a guy with a short temper in return kills the guy who attacked Casy. Tom had returned from the prison after getting a parole, convicted of killing someone in a fit of fury in the beginning of the story.

The immigrants are despised in California and looked upon as a potential threat by the owners of farm lands. Casy and later Tom finally understand the need for cooperative, as opposed to individualistic, solutions in times of misery.

Verdict: Serious, depressing, inflicted with misery.

Why you should not tailgate a Mercedes

2006-08-30T02:21:00.001+05:30

Axiom 1:
If you tailgate, and it brakes you have to either kiss it's back or smell burning rubber or both.

Axiom 2:
If you kiss, you have to either give up a fortune or find to your surprise that your car has a dent while the Merc does not even have a scratch.

I learned these two axioms the hard way today.

Scuba diving

2006-08-14T23:09:00.000+05:30

This pic is taken from an antique Kodak camera which was bought new for Rs. 500 in 1989 by my dad and sold for Rs. 750 in 2003 by me. The red tinge is probably due to exposure of the film to light.

9 Naga (2006)

2006-07-25T01:30:00.000+05:30

9 Dragons directed by Rudi Soedjarwo is the story of three gangsters - Marwan (Lukman Sardi), Lenny (Fauzi Baadila) and Donny (Doni Alamsyah) based in the ghettos of Jakarta. Each one has challenges in his own personal lives. Marwan lives with his handicapped wife and child, however runs from his family responsibilities. Donny wants to help his brother who has a keen interest in drawing and wants to pursue it as a career but is put off by high admission fees of the college. Lenny has developed a crush on a girl who serves in a bar but cannot express as she does not speak Bhasha and her uncle thinks he is a crook. Amongst all this fight for survival, there is a desire in them to move away from the maim. They believe "one kill is too many" but overcoming the challenges means getting out of the rut they are in. And to get out, they need a leap which can only be achieved by more maim. Marwan accidentally kills Donny in one such errands and is filled with regret for his actions and tries to change himself totally. BUT he ends up in a soup as he kills the person who used to hire him as an assassin. He buys the dream house of his wife from the stolen money from his hirer; gets his child immunised and gets ready to surrender to the police. But, the bad guys are now on a lookout for him for killing his hirer and the stolen dough. They hold Lenny captive and ask Marwan to come take him in return for the money. In the end Marwan meets the same fate as his preys used to.

Interesting fact from IMDB:
Actor Fauzi Baadila's belly button and the film's tagline "Manusia terbaik di Indonesia adalah seorang penjahat" (The best man in Indonesia is a criminal) on posters had to be covered with red tape a month before the film's release when the country's film censor board complained. The covers of the 9 Naga DVD and VCD do not contain the tagline but do, however, have a large red "X" posted over Baadilla's body part.

Director's successful attempts:
The background music and its editing was quite amazing and very timely placed in the scenes. Good storyline.

Director's failed attempts:
There was a strong attempt to make this a cognitively heavy movie but the transistion from gangster movie to emotional was not quite successful. Not once did I feel moved by any of the scenes. And this is partly due to the character's performances - I mean watching Marwan trudging slowly in guilt; hugging Lenny; putting on the white sweater woven by his wife looked far too melodramatic and sometimes funny. Another thing is the pace of the movie... it just makes you impossible to keep awake.

The Art of the Start: Guy Kawasaki

2006-07-06T11:40:00.000+05:30

Watch this. This is a presentation for entrepreneurs, given at TiE conference - loosely based on the book "The Art of the Start" by Guy Kawasaki.

Good times are rolling

2006-05-01T13:07:00.000+05:30

This weekend was good. Me, Pappi, Manyu-Latika and Mann finally managed to escape to Shimla. Friday evening to Sunday night was all action packed. I recall myself trying my best on Friday night - emitting brain waves into the slide deck that had to be sent across to the client. Never worked so efficiently ever I think. My neurons must have been damaged or something with the speed that I was working with. And then got behing the wheel. And then all the way to Shimla, it was an amazing drive. This is the first time I was driving in the mountains and that too in the night time. We reached Shimla at 4:30 am and checked into a hotel at 8 and hit the bed. After we woke up, the whole of Saturday we roam around, chatted, stared at the mountains and the monkeys, clicked pappi dressed as a pathan and had a very good time. Everyone was in a good mood and very positive. Well almost. And this is how you have good time right! So all that matters is the company around you and their mood. Be positive and be happy, thats how people around you are happy and then they make you happy.

Reminds me of Daneil Craig in Layer Cake "Life is so fucking good I can taste it in my spit."

iPod friends

2006-04-25T12:16:00.000+05:30

Ever seen ipod friends? This song. That video. This FPS. Apple merchandise. Sony strategy. Best Carl Zeiss lens. Freeware. Open Source. Hardware. (WTF) Software. Latest Xbox or PSP. Call of Duty. UMD. AAC. ID3 tags. Powerbook.

Where am I stranded? Feeling terribly lost. And this is with the people of my age. No physical generation gap. But yes in terms of gizmo knowledge I am probably living in stone age. My gizmo knowledge is growing at one-tenth the pace of Indian GDP growth rate. Five years before I had thought I would make up the difference now that I am out of the small town (Achal's analogy) but alas. I think its more than that. I think it's about getting access to these expensive swanky gizmos. Even more than that. I think i am not tech savvy. BUT I am happy as I am.

Gravitate/Glued/Grafted?

2006-04-15T17:16:00.000+05:30

It's 4:46 am in the morning and I just can't take my eyes off it. Do you gravitate or are you glued or are you grafted - to your computer I mean!! We IITians are trained to love our computers more than our girl friends or mother. And this is very evident from our sullen faces if our comp crashes or develops some problem... and I have long had the dubious distinction of having a jinxed comp.

Chatting, orkutting, emailing and music etc. and of course blogging. I go to office and sit infront of the comp screen for 10 hours, then come back watch a movie or chat with online friends and do random stuff. On an average I am infront of a comp for 13 hours a day. Is this how life is supposed to be?

We, The People

2006-04-02T12:45:00.000+05:30

Jagah dil mein ho ya chhat par, sab chalta hai. How cool. :)

Oye isne apne orkut profile pe committed likha hai!!

2006-02-26T13:44:00.000+05:30

"Oye isne apne orkut profile pe committed likha hai!!" said Rana. We were wondering how can a person like Vinayank be committed to a girl, or is he cheating on his current buddy. What will happen to Das if it's actually true.

This made me think a bit more about why people write committed in their profile. I would cover guys and girls separately here:
Girls:
Girl is into a relationship with a guy, intimate or not so intimate. But that gives her the opportunity to write commited (Single girl to any another girl: oh look she is commited. I am jealous.) on their profile. Also because they dont want random people making advancements to them over the internet.

Guys:
Usually wont write committed in their profile unless forced to do so. We guys are all very hopeful, always very optimistic in this regard. Ah if this girl looks that I am committed to someone then my chances are gone dude. While some guys who are single and have no chances to mingle write committed so that they can boast to guys "oh peh! isne bandi pata lee. Kuch karna padega, iske jaiso ki bandi hai aur hum yahan haath ki lakeere mita rahe hai" and make the girls think "kitna badiya banda hai. May be when he breaks up next time I can fix him up with one of my girl friends."

Happy Journey

2006-02-24T00:59:00.000+05:30

I just came back from the International airport at Delhi and I feel like I have visited a Gurudwara on a Gurupurab. Everytime a surdy passenger waved back there were atleast 10 hands waving back. The place was basically swarming with guys in variety of turbans. With no offense to surds, (I have had some very good surd friends at college and generally i find them really nice people) I would like to think why is this trend so prevalent in surds and why is it not prevalent in non-surds. Though a lot of surds travel in most out-bound flights from Delhi but that is a seperate issue again. Does this tradition has some reasoning behind it?

Ladki pasand hai?

2006-02-06T23:38:00.001+05:30

I just had a hilarious experience of being a part of a 'ladka-chayan' program for an arranged marriage this weekend. Both the parties involved opened up their most extended family tree to each other to get referrals. All this made me think, why is this method still followed. I concluded that this method of selecting a life-partner would have seemed obvious in olden times when child-marriages were the order of the day and the bride and the groom were literally carried in their parent's arm. Then it made sense that parents take the decision for their beloved children but I think this has just stayed, though its ebbing away in the metros now.

My mama when he was going to select my mami at her place was given the following instructions by his family:

Wave your index finger if you like the girl,
OR Wave your middle finger if you dont like the girl

He said he would agree but on seeing mami this is what he did - rapid waving of both index and middle fingers consecutively. The family decided to give the benefit-of-doubt to the girl and hence she is my mami today.

HAHA :-)

White hair and the art of taking homeopathic pills

2006-01-05T15:24:00.000+05:30

I am wise for my years and this wisdom shows in my hair which are getting white. To give up this wisdom so that my peers are relieved of the pressure, I decided to take some homeopathic treatment. Now, I have made a rule that I should be able to take out exactly two pills out in one go. And boy, this isnt easy..no kidding. You have to shake the bottle slowly and apply force in the optimum range so that only two (remember only two) pills come out. I also try doing this shaking the medicine bottle with my left hand, even if I am a rightie and it is even more difficult. Give it a try and you would know.

I once noticed my three year old neice taking homeopathic medicines. She doesn't bother to stick to the rule of 2. Of course, she likes the sweet taste.

Temples and Shrines

2006-01-04T13:08:00.000+05:30

India is a land where religion is so public that its impossible for you to ignore it. Hinduism being the prominent religion, there are innumerable temples and shrines across the length and breadth of the country. There is a temple in every village no matter how small the village might be.

Come to think of what would be the net value of all these structures put together. And then imagine if so much money would have been put into building infrastructure of the country, how useful it would have been. Ok, feature this: I was working in an NGO in MP where I noticed that the villagers might not have money to get a handpump installed in their village and thus walked a mile daily to fetch water, or otherwise there would be no roads or proper sanitary system and thus villagers might die of water-borne diseases. But they wont spend a dime on such things, however if a temple is to be built in the village everyone would donate generously. The villagers are right in thinking that they can pray to God in a temple which would "lead to a happier life", but is it worth it. I am puzzled when people place religion above basic amenities of life and it does happen very frequently in India.

I agree that praying on a daily basis is important for many people and I am not an atheist either. My concern here is how much space does religion reserve in our life and how it leads to superstition and false-belief. What it has also lead to is communal tension and all kinds of division and hatred between people. Well in words of Karl Marx "Religion is the opium of people"..

History is memory and memory is personal

2006-01-04T12:56:00.000+05:30

Why do we blog?
1. To say unagreeable things and thus stimulate discussions
Scott Adams blog is a perfect example of this category.
2. Capture your thoughts
Then whats the difference between writing a diary. Just that this is more public being on world wide web.

Anyways, lets blog now.